1. Horney described three basic attitudes regarding other people: moving toward, moving against, or moving away from them. Do you easily use all three styles of relating to others, or do you tend to rely on one more than the others? Does this create problems in your relationships?
Example: In my opinion over the course of my life I would have to say that I have hit all three of the basic attitudes in relating to other people. As of right now I would exhibit moving away from others. I am not a cold person nor do I not care for other people I am just very independent therefore it comes off as cold when I like to do things on my own in my own way. I don’t have a ton of friends in the area so I always by myself and I don’t mind that. I don’t go out of my way to start conversations with people or make new friends. This does create problems for me as I am so cut off from others I am very bad at picking up signs that someone wants to be friends with me or what peoples true intensions are. This has also strained a little bit of my relationship with my parents as I don’t talk to them about my problems or a lot of the things going on in my life. Earlier on in my life I was definitely moving against other people. When I was in High School I was a very cocky individual I will have to admit with my athletic ability and good grades. This caused a lot of issues with making long lasting friendships with those I grew up as they were for the most part very surface level friendships that diminished over time. Lastly, when I was in the Marine Corps I really came out of my shell and moved towards people. I was an Intelligence Analyst so I had to constantly communicate with high ranking officials and tons of people on a day to day basis. By doing so, this caused me to open up and seek acceptance from higher ups to solidify my spot in the shop. I was always seeking approval from the Officers and Staff NCO’s (Non-commissioned officers) so that I could get in head of my peers. I truly believe that I have changed over time and that is a normal thing.
2. Consider Maslow’s characteristics of self-actualizing people. Which of those characteristics do you think are part of your personality? Are there any characteristics that you think may be particularly difficult for you to achieve? Overall, do you feel that you are on a path toward self-actualization, and is that something you believe is important?
Example: After reading this chapter and learning about Maslow’s self-actualizing characteristics I was able to pick one out that I believe I follow that one being problem-centering. I would say this is part of who I am as an individual because I take it upon myself every day to make sure other people are taken care of and if I see someone in need or I see someone with a problem I will do anything in my power to fix that problem and or help them come up with a solution to that problem. I feel as though it is my duty to fix a problem if I see one regardless if it is my own problem or someone else’s.
For me the hardest characteristic for me to achieve would have to be Spontaneity. I say this because I usually go by the book in everything that I do. I like to have a system on how I do things or approach things but that can get me into trouble at times in redirecting my path when running into a problem. I truly believe that I am on the right path to self-actualization because I do exhibit more of the qualities than ones that I don’t. I do believe self-actualization is important because everyone should know who they are inside and out and realizing the things that they are good at and the things that they are bad at will help them grow as individuals and that person can then take it upon themselves to make themselves better.